really since last january, i have probably experienced my most frequent spells of what felt like artistic drought since i started this project. it’s not complicated or particularly enlightening. i got sick with the flu. i have too many non-art projects on my plate. we just put a huge panel discussion behind us that steve hosted but that took two weeks out of both of us. i usually try to spin such stretches as positives when it comes to to STILL blog. i try to praise the virtue of the dailiness of this project as an antidote to those kinds of stretches, and find a way to look back on the fact that i still made art during that time as a minor triumph that wins out over the fatigue and lack of inspiration. but i also need to acknowledge the fatigue and lack of inspiration themselves, because during those times, i don’t feel any anticipatory satisfaction at how, several months from now, i’m going to feel great about how i kept making art. while it’s happening it’s really just fatigue and lack of inspiration. and hard work that is necessary to do at times of the day when i’d rather be doing something else. that’s a part of this too. slogging through. feeling a lunchbucket kind of dreariness at the prospect of one more day and one more post. if that isn’t acknowledged as a kind of shitty place to be, then the pride that comes out of it later, not to mention the ecstasy of those periods of pure creative flow, mean less. a lot of what has gotten in my way is behind me now. i feel as if i am on the verge of emerging into a new energy level and a new creative focus. but before that happens, i want to say a brief fuck you to spring 2018.
pink cosmos bloom